Why I walked away

For the past three years I have worked in the field of childcare. I worked as an ECA while studying to receive my ECE diploma and then worked as a RECE once I completed college and registered.

And the truth is I loved my job, I would go home laughing about the crazy things the kids would say and sometimes do or shaking my head at the day I had because it was that hectic. Nonetheless I was always happy to return to work as I loved the children and the parents I worked with.

A little over a year ago I became the supervisor and was hesitant about the new role. I really had very little interest in managing people and truly loved the classroom and the interactions with the children. I also watched a few supervisors leave. ( that’s never a good sign)

However one was needed and I met the requirements, unfortunately the supervisor before me walked away from the job and the other one that would have provided my training was on maternity leave.

So as you can see I had reason to be nervous but she would eventually  return and the manager at the time did her best to teach me what she knew. Fast forward to the summer of 2016 the manager left while I was on vacation.

I returned to this role and felt unprepared and anxious but willing to try and try I did but the more I was in the role the less I wanted it and the supervisor  I was counting on to return and train me gave her notice that she was leaving.

This was the start of what I soon realized was anxiety attacks, I was obsessing over my work and reviewing my work repeatedly even when I know it was accurate to avoid making errors. And my heart would race when the phone rang out of fear that I did something wrong.

I started to hate coming to work plus I was battling anxiety (my heart palpitations where crazy) and the attacks started to take place every time the phone would ring.

I developed chest and following a doctors visit it would be found that my white blood cell levels were very low and ECG showed some abnormalities. (By the way I still have no clue what my body is doing.)

The unhealthy level of stress and anxiety coupled with the nature of the work environment and a meeting that took place in spring, made me realize I needed to leave .

And believe me I  was going to do it the right way by providing two weeks notice but events that occurred during my final week led me to believe that it was in my best interest to simply walk away.

This post is simply a reminder that nothing is more important than your health whether mental, emotional or physical and you have to know when it’s time to walk away from the things that are not good for you. I had to do it, although it was scary, sad and heart breaking. I simply have to focus on taking care of myself and being the best me possible.

Talk to you soon.

Kisses from K

Food for the Soul

I know I have been away for some time and as we often know life happens for me it was the holidays and moving. Yeah I have finally moved I have done furniture shopping and building and painting and all that jazz and as such and in this time I believe food for the soul is essential. So here is something I found that may be of benefit.img_8326

May every day of your life bring you fresh hopes for tomorrow, because hope gives all of us a reason for trying.

May each new day bring a feeling of excitement, joy and a wonderful sense of expectation. Expect the best, and you will get it.

May you find peace in simple things, because those are the ones that will always be there.

May you remember the good times and forget the sorrow and pain, for the good times will remind you of how special your life has been.

May you always feel secure and loved, for you know you are most deserving of it.

May you find warmth in others, expressions of love and kindness, smiles that encourage you, and friends who are loyal and honest.

May you realise the importance of patience, and accept others for who they are.
With understanding and love, you will find the good in every heart.

May you have faith in others and the ability to be vulnerable, be able to open your heart and share the beauty of love.

May you experience all the good things in life – the happiness of realizing your dreams, the joy of feeling worthwhile, and the satisfaction of knowing you’ve succeeded.

*Author unknown

Here’s to 2016

Dear 2016 you have been nothing short of amazing. You have made me a wife and a supervisor. You have given me lessons that taught me a greater appreciation of gratitude. You have exposed the toxic relationships that were in my life and helped me to eliminate them. You have taught me about friendships, truly lasting and amazing friendships. You have shown me how to love myself as well as take care of me and for all this I am absolutely grateful. With one more day to go I must say if 2017 is anything close to this year I will count it an exceptional one. I have no regrets just lessons learnt and I have gained in so many ways. I am forever #blessed …✌🏾#2016 it was fun 🤗

    Kisses from K

Lessons in Apartment Hunting

For a bit I have not posted a blog but between apartment hunting, a visit from my husband and moving life has been it’s busiest. I’m back today to share a few bits of knowledge gained in the process of apartment hunting. 

  • Calculate all your expenses against your income and see what you can afford. Keeping your apartment cost around the 30% mark of your net monthly income. Or atleast that was what I tried to do, however I live in Toronto and prices are ridiculously high so I had to go a little bit over budget. 
  • Find out the average cost of utilities as most places do not have utilities included. 
  • Think about location.  Know where you wish to live so that you can check the prices of places in the area to see if it’s feasible. For me I just needed to be in close enough proximity to work and keep commuting time low.
  •  Give your self enough time to find a place, two or more months preferably. This will allow you to not settle and gives you an opportunity to find things that are quite good within your budget. 
  • Ensure you have maintain great credit. If you want to move but your credit isn’t the best I suggest you give yourself time to improve it as it is vital. 
  • Lastly Start saving the minute you start earning so that when the time comes you have sufficient funds for the different expenses associate with moving.

As for me I was able to find a place that is within 15mins in public transit from work, close to a bus stop and within a budget I can afford. 

Lessons in apartment hunting will continue as my journey to getting my own place continues.

See you in my next post.

Until then

Kisses from K

And then comes Marriage

This years trip to St. Vincent was a little bit different and little more special. It was the trip that made me the wife of the love of my life and though not the smoothiest trip it was well worth the airline hassle that ensued.

My wedding day was just the way I wanted it for the most part, it was beautiful outside and those I love ,who were able to make it, were there.

Wedding day

I hope you enjoyed the video… once all the goodbyes were said and the wedding was over I had many beach days


A trip to an amazing waterfall

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And climbed La Soufriere



But above all I spent time with my love


I’m excited to share my next big adventure so stay tuned.

Kisses from K

When “life happen”

I am sitting here on the bus, usually at this time I’m in the gym making things happen but today no so much. 

This is when life happens. The thing about it is that situations like these always come up, but it can be quite demotivating. 

I have missed the gym for almost a month now and for a moment I started to have negative self talk. 

Then I caught myself, I took a moment to look back at what I spent the last couple of evenings that kept me away from the gym. 

Then I realized how much I accomplished in that time. 

The reality is that life has other things that come up and one will have to learn to readjust constantly to adequately accommodate all these new things while taking care of the things that you value. 

Just remember to not allow these adjustments to allow you to give up on your overall goal or you’ll never accomplish anything at all. 

With that said I cancelled my gym membership as I don’t believe in wasting money and I will be doing workouts at home. See my next post where I will tell you my plan.